After rain comes sunshine
by Sakura Batman the Unicorn
Summary: After Sasuke died, Naruto is one step away from going insane. he couldn't take it anymore and ran away. He didn't think he could ever love anyone else. But then there is Itachi. ItaNaru
1. The beginning of the end

ItaNaru

**Summary**: After Sasuke died, Naruto is 1 step away from going insane. He can't take it anymore and runs away. but then there is Itachi.

**Disclaimer**: i do not own Naruto. but the plot is mine.

**A/N: _this is yoai / shounen ai (male x male). You have been warned_.** Nothing happens in this chapter though. And I don't know yet if there is going to be smut scenes, I'll see when I get there... I want to apologize for any grammar mistakes. Also I wanted to ask if you could review. I don't really care if it's positive or negative though. Tips would be really, really, really nice! And if I've done something wrong or you think it would be better different just say so. I can handle it. I'm a big girl*wink*. You can ask me anything and you can say everything! Oh yeah, the story is from Naruto's point of view, but that's not hard to notice xD. Also, if you like AkuRoku you have to read _A Lesser Beauty _from Versace Frolic. It's amazing! I just love it.

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p><span><em>Prologue<em>

_I could try so hard to stop thinking about him._

_I could try so hard to forget his face._

_I could try so hard to get those red eyes out of my head._

_I could try so hard to act like I didn't care about him._

_But I'll never be able to forget him, or love someone else._

That's what I thought. But I've never been so wrong.

It's been four months since Sasuke died. It's been three week since the war ended. It's been five weeks when I last saw _him_. He who killed his own clan, just so he could see what he was capable of. He who killed his own brother, my best friend, for his eyes. They say he is inhuman, a monster. But, I know the truth. I know that the Third forced him to kill his own clan, because the Uchiha clan was a threat to Konoha. His brother was a danger to the world. Everyone treats him like he is traitor, while in reality he saved them. But he didn't want anybody to know the truth, to save his clan's pride. He even acts like it. Even if I would tell them now, they wouldn't believe me anyway. It makes me so angry. -_Angry because he's not here and I can't help him. Angry because I can't hold him in my arms and tell him everything's going to be alright, that I am here for him-. _But, he killed Sasuke. He tried to kill everyone I care for. He tried to kill me. So I don't really care. _-I do.-_

* * *

><p><span><em>Chapter One<em>

A knock on the door brings me to the sad reality. I've been in my appartement for 42 hours. 42 hours in these four walls, looking at the cracked walls. 42 hours where Kurama was the only one who kept me from going insane. 42 hours since I last talked to a person. '_Not that I_ wanted_ to talk to someone_.'

An other knock, louder now. I stand up from my bed, and walk to the door. When I open it, Kakashi is standing in front of me, his visible eye full of sorrow.

"So you're still alive." Kakashi sighed relieved.

_'It smells like rain outside.'_ I notice.

"So, are you up for some ramen?" Kakashi's left hand goes through his hair. In the other hand is a red book, like always. -_A book filled with painfull memories._-

"I'm not really hungry." My voice is firmer then I thought it would be. "I want to train today."

"The war is over, Naruto." Kakashi frowns slightly.

I look away -_It isn't in my head._- "The future Hokage has to be ready, right?"

An other sigh. "Okay, Naruto... I'll come back later." I can see a -_fake_- smile from underneath his mask. "You own me at least that." And he's gone.

"I don't want to be here, Karuma. I can't stay here like nothing happened, while the people I see are driving me insane. This place if filled with memories and it hurts so much."

"**I know, but you can't take your stuff and just walk away, Naruto.**" Karuma sighs "**You want to become Hokage don't you? It's your dream. Are you really ready to throw away everything you fought for?**"

"The people I fought for are dead, Kurama. What use does it have when the people I wanted to look up to me are gone?" I look away from Karuma, and said more like a whisper "Sometimes I still see them, but I know they aren't really there. So I lock myself up in my room so I don't have to see them, but they're also there in my sleep. they follow me everywhere." I'm just a step away from Karuma's wet nose. I don't know when that happened. "And being here, in Konoha, isn't helping me either." I started walking again, towards his belly. "Maybe it'll help if I have some change of atmosphere . Maybe it'll... I dunno... But maybe I need it" I was already on top of Karuma, sitting on his orange-red fur.

"**Naruto, if you think you need that, you know I'll support you. But you should go and see Tsunade first. It's not okay that you're seeing them.**"

"Hmm.. Okay.." But I was already half-asleep

%%

After I woke up, I went straight to Tsunade. I don't want to show my weakness by telling her that I'm seeing things, so I improvised.

"Ne Baa-chan, what is it called when someone you love dies, and even though they are gone, you keep seeing them?"

She looks at me, frowning. "Those are the symptoms of what is called post-traumatic stress-disorder."

"And that is?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Sometimes when something happens to you, or someone you care for deeply, it becomes very difficult to process." Tsunade rubs her forehead. "Sometimes you'll become delusional... But it's very rare."

"Hmmm..."

"Naruto." She is staring at me, worried. "Why do you ask?"

"What would you do if I left the village..?" I avoid her question, and her gaze. '_I__'m making it worse._'

"If you try to do that, you'll make me worry a lot, Naruto, you know that very, very well. I already lost Jiraya and certainly don't want to lose you too." She walks over to a chair and sits down. I don't move an inch. "And not only me, everyone of the village cares about you."

'_That's because I saved their asses, they didn't care if I died before that.' _

"I know baa-chan, I wouldn't leave the village." I look her in the eyes and smile. "I'm going to be Hokage after all."

%%

After I left Tsunade's place, I walk around aimlessly. When I was thinking about eating at Ichiraku, I saw a glimpse of pink hair. Sakura. I hid before she could see me. She's talking with Hinata about someone.

"I think he's sick, Hinata. When I went over the other day I heard him screaming and when I knocked everything went silent. In the end I just left, because he didn't open the door. And today too. Tsunade told me that she thinks Naruto is seeing people." Her voice is trembling, like she's about to cry."It doesn't look like he wants any help from us. He didn't even go eat ramen with Kakashi-sensei."

"I know it's hard, but don't just jump into any conclusions okay? Shall we go and talk to Tsunade first and then think of something to help Naruto."

I didn't want to hear more of their bullshit. I'm not sick and I'm not delusional. but one thing is true though. I am leaving Konoha.

%%

I loosened my headband and put it on the table '_I'm leaving it here. It's for the best._' I just started to pull all of my clothes out of my closet to look wich clothes I should take with me, when I hear a knock on my door. I thought it was just Kakashi who wants to treat me ramen, but when I open my door, Iruka is standing in front of me.

"Everyone is worried about you." he starts "Can I come in? I really need to talk to you"

_-No- _"Ofcourse." I take a step aside, so he can come in. After he walked in, I close the door and turn around. I know what he sees. He knows what I'm about to do. Iruka turns around to look at me, a sad smile on his face.

"You're leaving, aren't you." I look away.

"I can't handle it here."

"Naruto,-"

"I can't stay here, Iruka-sensei." I didn't want to hear him talk about 'We are your friends Naruto, you can trust us.'

"I'm nearly going insane being here." I have to look at him, but I can't. I hear his footsteps come closer to me.

"We're your friends, Naruto. We're here to help you." Iruka grabbed my hand and pulled me closer, so I could feel the warmth of his embrace.

"You can't help me. Not this time." I push him away and walk to the center of the room, picking up the clothes I want to take with me "I have to do this alone. I _**want **_to do this alone. I need this." I put the clothes in my bag and take some instant ramen out of my so called kitchen and also put them in the bag. "I'll come back, I promise." My voice was no more than a whisper now. "Will you take care of my headband?"

"I can't stop you can I?"

"You can, but it will drive me insane." He sighs.

"I'll take care of it." He smiles, a little desperate. "So, come back please." His hand goes through my hair before I turn around take my bag, leaving my room a mess and leave without looking back.


	2. A dream-like reunion

ItaNaru : After rain comes sunshine.

**Summery**: After Sasuke died, Naruto was 1 step away from going insane. He can't take it and runs away. He didn't think he could ever love anyone else. But then there is Itachi. ItaNaru.

**disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto. But the plot is mine.

**A/N: This is yaoi/shounen ai (male x male)**. You have been warned. Thank you Marale-chan! Why would I even want to leave? I love ItaNaru! My favorite Naruto pairings are ItaNaru and KakaNaru. But to get back to the point, I'm happy you like it ;D. I also hope you like this chapter. And I'm sorry about the last part of chapter 1.

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2 <strong>

I have no idea how long I've been running. It's been 3 day's since I left Konoha. I think. It's morning now, so they're probably already searching for me. Except if Iruka convinced Tsunade., but that's almost the same as impossible. '_Maybe I'll find away of contacting her in Sunagakure _.'

"**Do you know for sure that that's a good idea? You don't want to leave any tracks do you?**" I sighed, because Karuma is right. If I leave any tracks, they would find me faster then I want them to. They would probably lock me up because they think I'm _delusional. _Maybe I am, but it will go away. -_I hope.-_ I know it will. -_I don't_.-

"It's not a good idea, but we have to go any way. I need a mask. And maybe a coat." I jump on a branch, to get higher up the tree, so I can move faster.

%%

It's night and I need to rest, because I'm barely able to jump. I sit down against a tree, my senses not reacting like they should.

"What are you doing here?" I shoot up at the voice. A voice I know well, though can't remember, my eyes already searching from were the sound came from. First I thought my mind was playing a trick on me again, but this is not Sasuke. His hair was blacker and longer. His eyes brown and deeper, but they are not filled with darkness I saw in Sasuke's. His neckless shines on his collarbone. Itachi. I'm stunned

"I could say the same about you." I can see a glimpse of interest cross his eyes. But interest for what? His stance becomes more relaxed, as if I'm no danger to him. '_I'm probably not.'_

"You know I have the capture you right?"

_'I should run_.'

"I'm not going anywhere."

_'What_?'

Itachi grins. It's not filled with the bloodlust I always saw on the face of the Akatsuki members, but I don't understand the emotion that _is_ behind it. I want to step away, but my back bumps against the tree. '_I can't even go anywhere.'_

He moves closer to me slowly and I blink. Wich is of course the wrong decision. He is not even one step away from me, our noses almost touching. I can feel his hot breath on my skin. He chuckles and I can feel blood rush to my cheeks.

"Oh, really now?" He says slowly, his grin widening. "That's surprisingly... amusing."

_'Whatever this is, it's starting the get more confusing by the second.'_ His mouth moves to my ear, so I tilt my head back a little giving him acces to do what he wants to, even though I know I shouldn't do that. '_I want something, but I don't even know what.'_

"I'll let you go." He whispers, I can hear the smile in his voice. "This time." His hand goes up and his fingers touch my eyelids, but before I can react, he's gone. Just like that. No warning. I let go off the breath I didn't even know I was apparently holding, and collapse. I can still feel his body close to mine, the warmth of his breath, the fingers on my face.

"What the heck happened?" I mumbled.

"**I have no idea**." Karuma answers, but I'm already asleep.

%%

When I woke up everything that happened yesterday was like dream. I mean, why didn't I fight back? What in the world was he saying? What was so amusing? And why did he let me go? I tried to stand up, but my head starts to spin and I almost throw up, so I needed to sit down again.

"What in the world did he do to me?" I rub my forehead.

"**He didn't use any genjutsu. He certainly did something with your eyes though, but I can't figure out what.**"

"I feel like I'm going to trow up."

"**When was the last time you ate?**"

"I don't know. A long time ago, that's for sure. But I also have no food left, so we really need to get to the city, fast." When I finally manage to get up without throwing up, I get on the move again. I need to reach the city before I die from this hunger. Wich is weird, since I'm used to not eat anything for weeks but still working out.

I made a big mistake, though. I didn't pay any attention to my surroundings. I didn't know I was being followed.


	3. Tears and kisses

ItaNaru : after rain comes sunshine.

**Summary**: After Sasuke died, Naruto is one step away from going insane. He couldn't take it and ran away. He didn't think he could ever love anyone else. But then there is Itachi.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto. But the plot is mine.

**A/N : This is Yaoi/shounen ai (male x male)**. You have been warned. TigrezzTail, I have no idea.. But give me some time and I'll get a reason. somehow. _I hope_. Anyway, I know that ch 2 was really really really short, and I'm sorry for that! this one is more more more, but ch 4 is like, 1800 words ;) ... But that chapter is still under construction. I'm still trying to get these two like, totally glued together... Like cheese to a pizza! Omnomnomnom -w-. Let this chapter be tasty enough for you! (that's so so so cliché, I know)

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p>I finally reached Sunagakure, but it was already night. Almost all restaurants are already closed, except for the little ramenbar I used to go to with Jiraiya. I ate two bowls before I left. I'm tired, I stink and I can barely stand, but I know there's a hotel nearby. I need a warm and nice bath because it's been like a week ago since I had one. It's been a week since I left Konoha. I still see <em>them. <em>To be honest, it's even worse than before. The same about the nightmares. I know they're just dreams, that they aren't real. -_But it still scares me-_.

%%

I just got out of my long and peacefull bath, putting on my clean pants and t-shirt, when I hear the front door open softly. I tiptoe to the bathroomdoor and open the door a bit, -_trembling- _trying to make as little noise as possible. When I see nothing strange, I open the door completely, thinking I imagined it. A wrong decision. Again.

"It's not such a good idea to hide here."

My head shoots around to see from where the voice came, but I already know.

"Why not?"

Itachi frowns. "You mean you haven't noticed yet?" He closes the door and comes closer. "Are you okay?"

I step away. "Y-yeah why wouldn't I be"

'_I only haven't slept for a while.' _My back hits the wall. Why does he always manages to close me in? He's so close and I can feel my heartbeat go faster. "And it's not like I'm in danger"

_'yes I am, what in the world am I doing?'_

He chuckles, while putting his hand on the wall and bends even closer to me. "You feel save with me?" He whispers, the warmth of is body radiating of him.

"M-maybe." I can feel my cheeks burn like fire. When he grins I start to feel dizzy. I want him to step away now. -_I want him to hold me_-. Go away. -_Stay with me forever_-. He's crazy and insane. -_He's handsome and _fucking_ sexy_-.

"Really now." His brown eyes seem to sparkle."So you don't want me to go?"

"N-no."

His grin grows wider. "Then ask me to stay."

I don't want to stare in his eyes, but I can't move."P-please... S-Stay..." I whisper and finally manage to look away. "M-maybe they w-won't come-" I mumble and gasp as the words tumble out of my mouth, pulling my hand over my mouth. It slipped out with out a warning.

Itachi blinks and puts his hand on my cheek, forcing me to look at him. "Who are _they_?" I can see the concerns on his face and I feel the tears roll over my cheeks before I actually notice that I'm crying. It's like all the feelings I've been suppressing were flowing out.

"I-I see S-Sasuke s-sometimes. He s-says it's m-my fault t-that h-he d-died." Itachi freezes for a second, before also bringing his other hand to my face, trying to wipe my tears away. "S-sometimes Mom a-and Dad a-also come, t-they'll say it's m-my f-fault that there was w-war. That it's my f-fault everyone died. Your p-presence makes me feel so safe, w-while I know it r-really shouldn't!" My crying becomes less and I bury my face in his shoulder and he curls his arms around me. "Like y-you'll protect me no m-matter what will happen." I barely hear the last sentence myself and I start wondering if I actually said it out loud.

Itachi pushes me back against the wall and takes my chin in his hand, forcing me to look at him. "You're not crazy. It's not your fault. You shouldn't feel guilty" He smiles. _H__e is so handsome_. "I'll take the guilt away." He whispers when he starts to lean in closer. I could feel the blood rush to my face again when his face comes so close to mine, closing my eyes just before I can feel his lips against mine. My hands go up and my arms pull his body close against mine. His kiss is soft, -_just like I had imagined_-, and I was melting. His hands go to my waist and he lifts me up against the wall. I fold my legs around his waist to hold balance. I want to gasp from the friction it causes, but that only gives him the opportunity to slip his tong in my mouth. He breaks our kiss to breath, but before I get the chance to pull him in an other kiss, he presses his mouth against my neck. I bite my lower lip to suppress the sounds that want to come out of my throat, but I can't suppress a little pleasured moan that slips out of my mouth when his hand goes under my shirt. His hand feels so hot on my skin, like it was pleasantly burning me. Itachi stops and back away a little. I can see his eyes were filled with surprise and amusement before he grins.

"You liked that, huh?" It's to late to be embarrassed, but I can't stop my cheeks from becoming redder. I nod slightly, out of breath, and move to pull him into a kiss when I hear voices out of the hallway. Voices I know very well. I close my eyes and bury my face in his shoulder.

"Shit. they found me." I look up see Itachi's face. "That's what you meant, wasn't it?" He nods and wanted to put me down, but before he can I pull him back for one last kiss. At the same moment Sakura opens the door to find us tangled in a kiss. I look at her to see her green eyes widen.

"N-N-Naruto?"

Suddenly Sakura screams and jumps back, just in time before she would fall together with the collapsing ground. She looks at me and I don't look away. Not even when Itachi puts me back on my feet, still keeping a hold of my waist, like I will run away if he doesn't. I feel something I've never felt before. It's not hatred, but it comes close to it. Kakashi jumps in front of her, Sai joining him, while Ino rushed to Sakura's side to help.

"I was going to return at some point, but not now and not this way. I'm not ready to go back." I don't ever want to return, is what I want to say, but I promised Iruka.

"You don't know what you're doing." Kakashi said.

I'm hurt by his words, because I thought that Kakashi would trust me. "And what if I don't? I won't allow you to take me back. I won't allow you to even touch me, let stand help me."

"But you allow _him_ to help you!" Sakura yelled

"We are your friends, Naruto, he only kills people," Ino said

"You only started to _care_ when I **saved** your lives" I snapped. "You all saw me as **a monster**. A **fucking disgusting monster**. I tried all my live to get noticed, but you never cared. Except now." The walls cracked, and I see the shocked expressions. I don't know why, but I have a feeling that they aren't only shocked because of my outburst. There's something... _different_ about me. "Well, I don't give** a damn** anymore. I'm **done **with _every last one of you_. So fucking leave me alone! I'm **not** going back with you!"

Itachi hand tightens softly around my waist and I feel the anger reduce a bit. Suddenly every part of my body hurts and Itachi picked me up before I collapse, I can feel his warmth on my bare arms and legs. When I see his brown eyes, I melt, not remembering what happened mere seconds ago. A smile formed on my face before everything becomes dark.

I can't remember the last time I felt so safe.


	4. The unknown secret

ItaNaru: after rain comes sunshine

**Summary**: After Sasuke died, Naruto is 1 step away from going insane. He couldn't take it anymore and ran. He didn't think he could ever love someone again. But then there is Itachi. ItaNaru

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto. But the plot is mine.

**A/N**: **This is Yaoi/shounen ai (male x male)**. You have been warned. This is not the ch I meant. but I changed everything, so the story would be longer. And also less... weird... I think. Also, TigrezzTail, I found my reason. you'll find out about it in an other ch, after Naruto found out what _that_ is.

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p>Chapter 4<p>

I wake up in Itachi's arms, the warmth of his bare chest and arms embracing me. I'm even able to feel it through my shirt. I want to rip it of just to feel his warmth on my almost-naked body. This warmth is something I can die for. I need it, now, and I can't even understand how I ever lived without it. I don't know why I wanted to kill myself for a couple of stupid dreams and delusions, before knowing this. This euphoria. I look at his sleeping face.

'_It is so... peaceful... so pleased.' _I sneak out of his arms without waking him up, pull of the t-shirt, throw it away and slip back. '_I'm such a pervert'_. Suddenly I hear a chuckle and I freeze, because it has to be weird to wake up with a 5 year younger boy who's only wearing pants snuggling up to you. His hand goes through my hair, while his the fingers of his other hand follows the line of my spine. I crawl completely on top of him.

"Kiss me." I whisper, my voice trembling full of excitement. Itachi smirks and does as I asked him. He gives me so much warmth my blood boils. In not even second I'm imprisoned beneath him and I fold my arms and legs around him, pressing his body closer against mine, because I want more. So much more. I want to have more until I can't have more.

"Are we going to be interrupted this time again." I ask, panting.

"Maybe, maybe not." He grins. "it's almost impossible." A kiss. "To find to place, but" Another kiss. "We're talking about Konoha-shinobi." He kisses me again.

"Maybe also some ANBU," I say. "because you took me." My hand finds a lock of his pitch black hair. "And with it you stole something else."

He looks at me, confused. "I didn't steal anything."

I smirk, pull him into a soft kiss and whisper against his lips. "Oh, but you did... You can keep it though... It's all yours now." His grin was more than enough to make me melt more than I thought was possible.

"Oh, really now."I moan softly when he shifts a bit. My body will be enslaved to him if we keep this up, but I don't give a fuck about it now. He was the first person I ever felt save with. He broke through the walls no one else had ever broken down the first time I ever saw him, 3 years ago. I already surrendered at our first touch. My body already knew what it wanted before I actually did. He kisses my neck and I twitch, my hearts stops for a second, before feeling his grin against my shoulder. His chest was pushing against mine, my legs fold tight around his hips, my arms wrapped around his neck, his hands on my lower back and on my ass. He pulls me up, so he can sit, while I'm on his lap. Suddenly I remember everything that happened last night, like a hit in my face. I slowly pull back and ask what happened there.

"I can't tell you." His face is serious. "If you don't find out about it yourself, it won't have any purpose that I gave it to you."

"What won't?" I frown, confused.

"_It _won't" He grins. "I know you can found out yourself."

I sigh "Okay... Also," I close my eyes. "I'll have to go back to Konoha soon."

Now it's his turn to be confused. "Why?"

"Well... I promised I would come back. And I think it's the best time if I do that now. I've finally found myself... but I won't be able to stay there... since you're not allowed to be there..." I open my eyes and his face looks lost and sad. "Maybe we can convince Tsunade... Maybe we can find a way to get her to know the truth... maybe we can live in Konoha, together." My hands go through his hair. "I've only been away from Konoha for 8 days and I already have enough of the chasing. it's like a game of tag. I can't do this all my life."

He closes his eyes and buries his face on my neck. "I know a way."

I can feel the hope run through my veins. "R-really?"

"Yeah." He replies. "But they'll have to let me into Konoha to go to the hidden Uchiha Temple..."

"Why do you need to go there?"

he grins. "You'll know when we there... It's a surprise untill then..."

"Okay."

"When do you want to leave?"

_'Not now.'_

"As soon as possible... Actually, where the fuck are we?"

He looks at me, before he starts laughing. "You think of that now?"

I blush, confused of his sudden outburst. It's the first time I see him laughing like that, and it only makes me want him more. Love him more. "Y-yehh.. It's not my fault you distract me..."

He starts to laugh again before answering. "We're in the old Akatsuki hide-out in the Land of Rain. We can make it to Konoha in 2 days if we don't run into any trouble."

My hand follows the line of his shoulder. "Like ANBU... or some troublesome shinobi..." I frown. '_So Ino took my place_?' Not that it really matters. A chuckle brings me back to where I am. "I probably should grab you some clothes before we leave here"

I blush. "There are clothes here my size? You're like 10 cm bigger than me"

"I don't know, if there aren't any I'll just let you wear my clothes"

A grin sneaks on my face. "Oh really now." I glide back onto the bed so he can move. He stands up and I lose sight of him when he steps through the doorway.

"**H**e **has done something with your eyes.**"

Karuma's presence hit me like an arrow. He's been here all this time, and I forgot him. I've done and said all kinds of embarrassing things, while he was looking... "_Y-you also know what he did...?"_

He smirks, probably because he know what I'm thinking about. "**No, and even if I did I wouldn't tell you now.**"

"_Wh-why not?"_

"**You forgot about me.**_" _He sighs. _"_**And also because he said you should find about yourself, because it wouldn't have any purpose else.**"

"_S-sorry... But what in the world could he have done with my eyes?"_

Silence_. "_**It has to be something logical. Something that if he would tell you, you would slap your forehead because it's obvious.**_"_

Itachi comes back in the room with some clothes. "I've only got black clothes left. They're a little tight for me, but they'll possible will be to big for you." He throws them to me and put them on. He is right, they're to big for me. The sleeves and trousers are too long, but it's comfortable. Not only comfortable, they also smell like him. Like Itachi. My own source of warmth and love. I smile before I notice he's staring at me. "You're hot in dark clothes, but downright sexy in my clothes."

I try to hide my blushing face in the sleeves. He walks over to me and gives me a pair of shoes. They fit perfectly. Again a smile unfolds on my face and I look at him, while he answers my smile. "Shall we go, little black sunshine?" he asks, smiling softly. I nod. '_I like the nickname.'_

This is the start of our fight, and I've never been more happy to fight. This is a fight so we could live without running, without hiding, but filled love. I know we will be able to win this fight. Together we can do anything.


	5. KakaIru

**Summary: **After Sasuke died, Naruto is 1 step away of going insane. He couldn't take it anymore and ran away. he didn't think he could ever love anyone again. But then there is Itachi. ItaNaru

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto. But the plot is mine.

**A/N**: **WARNING: ****This is Yaoi/Shounen ai (male x male)**. You have been warned!

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p>chapter 5<p>

Infiltrating Konoha was not hard. The guards by the Front gate were asleep. What isn't really weird, since it's only 2 A.M., and it's not like they get any impostors. Well... except for me. If I can call myself an impostor. My way through Konoha is easy. I noticed the streets look different. Like they're sad and lonely. Nobody is coming through, except for Shikamaru. He doesn't notice me though, and I passing him is easy._ 'he looks drunk'._ But this is only the easiest part. I'm going to ask Tsunade to trust me. To trust the unknown truth. To trust me to let Itachi in. To trust me he will not kill anyone or destroy anything. She probably won't. Nobody will. They'll lock me up, because I'm _delusional_. But I have to try. Suddenly a conversation from earlier with Itachi popped up in my head.

%%

"_Naruto, I don't know.."_

"_Hmm? What do you not know?" I watch at him._

"_If I want to live in Konoha, after everything... I mean, yes I killed the clan because the Third asked me to, but I could have declined. Yet I killed them. And not only them, but other people too." He looks away. "And I attacked a lot people. I almost killed you too..."_

"_Itachi, I never said we would have to live in Konoha. I just don't want to run for my whole live. We can at least try. If it doesn't work, we'll try something else." I smile at him, and he smiles back, pulling me closer, kissing my temple before I fall asleep arms._

"_I love you." I murmur._

"_I love you too, my little sunshine." I hear his soft voice, but it's already somewhere far away._

* * *

><p>I'm already in front the window. I watch through it to see if there's anything strange, but there isn't. I slide the window open, without Tsunade hearing it, and sit down on the window frame.<p>

"I'm home, Tsunade-baa" I whisper, trying not to scare her. She twirls around fast, and I can see her eyes widen

"Naruto?!" she stands up and walks over me.

"H-" she cuts me off with a simple hug. Well... Not really simple, since I can't breath, but I don't really care either. I hug her back, sighing, knowing I missed her a lot.

"I'm really sorry." I start. "I needed to go away here for a while... I- maybe I was delusional... but it's gone now. No delusions, no nightmares."

She pulls back, but letting her hands rest on my arms. "What about Itachi? And why do you have s-"

"Itachi is the reason they're gone." I cut her off. "He isn't like everyone thinks he his. I already knew before, but..." I start. "Do you know the truth?" I can slap myself. Why would I ask that?

"The truth?" she looks at me, confused. "What truth, Naruto?"

"The truth about Itachi. The truth about him killing his clan." I look at her, without looking away.

"Didn't he kill them because he wanted to know what he was capable of?"

I shake my head. "No, but if I would tell you the truth, you wouldn't believe me. and also I promised I wouldn't tell anyone." I can feel I weird feeling coming up to my throat. "He said he could prove it to you in the hidden Uchiha temple..."

"Naruto, by letting him in the whole village will be in danger. Maybe he killed the clan for a different reason, he still killed other people."

Her answer stabs me in the chest, because I know this is also the truth. A truth I didn't want to hear.

"P-please... Tsunade-baa-chan... I know he won't do anything..." I feel tears come up and I press my eyes shut to hold them. "I need him." I mumble. "Give him one more chance..."

She sighs. "Naruto, I c-"

"Just think about it." I want to jump back outside, but she stops me.

"You'll stay here for the night?" Her eyes full of amazement

"Y-yeah... I'll come back for the answer tomorrow. Don't tell anyone about me, please. They'll probably become historical." She nods and let go of me and I offer her a smile before I jump, going to my own devastated house. The house where I ran away from, because nights weren't nights anymore, and days were filled with darkness.

* * *

><p>I'm standing in front of my door. This is where it all started. This is where hell started to stare at me, while playing tricks on me. It's been four days ago when it stopped staring. But Itachi is not here, so I don't know if it will happen again. I sigh and walked in, closing the door behind me. I stare at the clean living room. <em>Did Iruka clean it up after I left?<em> I smile, thanking my old sensei. I walk over to my bed and lay down, but I'm not tired.

"Karuma"

"**Hmm?**" He answers, like has been asleep all this time.

"She probably won't agree, will she?"

"**Probably not.**" silence. "**Just try to sleep, you don't know what might happen.**"

I sigh and turn around. "How could I be able to sleep?"

**"Then do something else, just let me sleep."**

"Yeah yeah, I get it." I jump up and walk over to the bathroom. I run the bad, pulling off my clothes. Steam is coming from the hot water and I stop the tap before stepping in.

_'Maybe I should go to Iruka so he knows I kept my promise_.'

I close my eyes, enjoying the hot and relaxing water. Only my head above the water, I sigh.

"Habataitara modoranai to itte~." I hum " Mezashita no wai aoi aoi ano sora~~." Now the tune is stuck in my head.

* * *

><p>"Hey."<p>

Iruka's head shoots around when he hears me and I can see Kakashi's head coming out of the kitchen. '_He probably already noticed me before I was here.'_

"Naruto!" Iruka stands up. "You're back!" He hugs me and I can only think that this is the second time this happened today.

"Yeah... but I can already be gone tomorrow... maybe... I don't know yet..."

"Where's Itachi." Kakashi is standing next to us.

Iruka let go of me and I smile at Kakashi. "No need to worry, he's not here."

"You know we normally should capture you and bring you to Tsunade, do you?"

I raise my shoulders, still smiling. "No need for that either, I've already been to her."

"What are you talking about? Itachi? Tsunade? What's going on?" Iruka asked

I look at him, confused, and then look at Kakashi. "You haven't told him?"

"..." Kakashi looks away.

I sigh. "I ran away with only you knowing it, Iruka-sensei." Kakashi looks at Iruka, eyes wide. "And after that I found Itachi." I start. "Itachi is not who you think he is. But I can't tell why. I promised I wouldn't a long time ago." I notice I'm whispering. "Anyway, later on Kakashi and his group found us and we got into a fight. I don't really understand what happened there, but I know I ended up fainting."

Iruka and Kakashi are both staring at my, mouth wide open. I understand it about Iruka, but why also Kakashi? "W-what?" I look at him.

"So you don't know why the ground collapsed and why the walls cracked? You don't know why you got angry, shouting we didn't care about you, before you saved our lives?"

My eyes widen and for a second I can't say a thing. "The last part I do know. The reason is that it's the truth. The only ones who cared where Iruka-sensei, Jiji, Ero-Sennin and Tsunade. And don't try to tell me it isn't true." I hissed. I can feel a raw anger burn up again, but I'm able to suppress it. "And about the first part, I don't. But you can't tell me either. I have to find out myself."

Kakashi looks like he's about to say something, but changes his mind and turn around, back to the kitchen. '_Why is he actually here?'_ Iruka sits down and I stare it him, while he's deep in thoughts.

"I can't give you back you're headband, can I?" I shake my head furiously and he sighs. "Why are you going away this time?"

"I don't know if I'm going away again, Iruka-sensei. It depends on the choice Tsunade makes." He looks at me, and is about to say something. "It's something between Tsunade and me." I say quickly.

He looks away and I can see the sad expression in his eyes.

"Thanks for cleaning up after I left."

"No problem." he mumbles.

"So," I start "You and Kakashi, huh?"

He looks at me, a small blush on his face. I was only trying to make I joke, but I was right.

"Really?!" I ask my eyes as wide as they can be.

"**Tss, even I could see that, Naruto.**_"_ Karuma replies.

"Y-yeah..." Iruka answers. This was quite a surprise, but I couldn't help a smile curl on my face.

"How long already?"

This question looks like a surprise to him. "Since after the war.. But nobody knows"

I laugh and he freezes. "Oh god, you're so innocent." I tell him.

"N-N-Naruto!" my laugh becomes louder and notice Kakashi is standing in the door frame.

I was trying to wipe my tears away when I hear Kakashi speak.

"So you're with Itachi?" I froze in an instant, my smile gone.

"What?!" Iruka shoots up from his chair.

I step back, smirking. "Yeah." I turn around. "Kakashi, take good care of him." I whisper, before I disappear.

* * *

><p>I'm still in bath, the shadow clone that I sent giving me the memories of what happened. The water is getting cold so step out and I empty the bath before walking out of the bathroom. I freeze, scared of seeing something, but there is nothing. I sigh and walk over to the fridge. There are still some energy drinks, so I take one, before walking over to my bed and sit down on it.<p>

"Kakashi and Iruka huh..." I grin. I take a nip of the energy drink, lean with my back against the wall, legs on the bed, feet in the air. _I'm back in a four walled cage that people call home._ My hair is still dripping and I'm naked. I hadn't taken the effort to put any clothes on, only wrapping a towel around my hips. I cross my legs and sigh. It's like I haven't seen Itachi for a year. _It's only one day,_ I say to myself. But I can only hope so. I gulp down the last of the drink and throw it across the room. I lay down, arms on my chest and legs up, like a little ball. It took a while before I fell asleep. But when I did, the dreams never came.

* * *

><p><strong>AN**: I really don't dislike KakaIru! they're so cute together... and the song Naruto sings is Blue Bird, one of the openings of Naruto. that one is my favorite. thehe. And also I wanted to tell you this isn't the super original Naruto world. they have washer and Redbull and stuff.. they also have luxury bedrooms!


	6. Darkness

**A/N**: I'm sorry for changing this chapter, but I just had too... It was pretty hard to read and I changed a couple of sentences. Anyway, sorry for not posting for a loooong time. I'm already busy with chapter 7, so I don't think it will take that long before I post it but for some reason I just can't get it done.

"Rawr." People talking.

"**Rawr.**" Tailed beast/summon animals talking.

_'Rawr_.' Thinking.

-_Rawr_.- These are sentences that are supposed to be crossed through, so... kind of like forbidden thoughts?

%% A time skip.

* * *

><p>Darkness.<p>

That's all. I always pretended to be the light, while Sasuke didn't hide the dark. We were so much alike, and that's probably why he was my best friend.

The boy who never let anyone let close to him. The boy who's life was chasing his big brother, trying to kill him. The boy who called himself an avenger. The boy who understood me so far as possible, without the intention of understanding me. _The boy who had darkness like me_.

And then, suddenly, Itachi is here. He's here for me and he was only giving me attention. That wasn't really something Sasuke was happy about. I watched my best friend trying to attack the man I fell in love with at first sight, but failed and got beaten up instead, Ero-Sennin saving us.

Sasuke became even darker than I thought was possible and I felt more alone than ever. Then he just left.

Chasing him became my new goal in life. I promised Sakura I would get back Sasuke.

There was a little light in my darkness. Hope. The hope that people might understand me. The hope that I would get him back and feel myself again. That hope left me, just like anything else. Sasuke died.

I could feel my whole being break, shattering in ten thousand pieces.

My goal was gone, my heart was empty, my mind was in darkness.

I fled from everything, it all lost meaning. There was nothing left. But, when I was alone I found someone. Or maybe he found me. It was a long-lost love that was never lost, and this was the thing that brought the light back again, bigger than ever. I found my new goal. And he made me regret nothing I've done.

But that love isn't here right now, so the light isn't either. I'm alone again, alone like I always have been. No dreams, no nightmares, just sad memories and darkness.

A lot of darkness...


End file.
